This was the outline of an article being prepared for Issue No. 21 of the "old" Nurturing Potential.


Remedial Generative Evolutionary Change

Emotional Intelligence

Key components


Most people, adults or children, are completely unaware of the power of their own conditioning, especially in relation to ‘cultural scripting’. This last has many implications for people with different cultural and familial norms.


Many people do not manage their own feelings and emotions (around diversity issues) because they lack awareness* of their own ‘scripts’.


The power of habit, and the defensiveness that ensues, often prevents or inhibits people from acting on new information such as data and experience from training events.


Many people, though better informed about the issues, may not be aware of the impact of, for example, their silences.

Relationship Management

Given experiences that take them through these stages, people will often wake up to the fact that they have real choices, and whether or not they act on those choices there is a price to pay. They develop greater understanding and empathy and are more willing to contribute in ways that makes a real difference in their personal and professional lives.

* Ignorance is a starting point not a sin!


Intelligent Optimism

Pessimism often outweighs optimism. A decision to focus on what is lacking and what is wrong with the world, makes people worry, fret, complain, whinge and see themselves in a bad light compared to others. This negativity affects us physiologically, psychologically, emotionally, intellectually, academically, socially and spiritually.

The French magazine Psychologies (January 2005) suggested we focus on "intelligent optimism."

According to their insight, intelligent optimists:

Don’t deny but adjust to problems while still seeking opportunities for progress.

Choose not to get overwhelmed by what they can't change but focus on what they can enjoy and what is within their grasp.

Know that for every problem there is (at least the beginning of) a solution, and that the search for that solution can be inspirational in itself.

Think of negative thoughts as potentially useful messages to listen to or reject.

Just Nod "Yes"
Intelligent optimism starts with a realistic attitude toward the situation as it is. Determine what you can't change or mend, then focus on what you CAN change.

If you want someone to change, start from where they are, not where you think they ought to be!

Nodding your head when thinking negative thoughts actually strengthens your disapproval and increases confidence in your negative thoughts. In contrast, when the thoughts are mostly positive, then nodding increases confidence in your positive thoughts.

Try this: As you go about your day today, notice how you’re responding to what is happening around you. Try making a conscious choice to respond, rather than just automatically reacting in your customary way. And nod your head to remind yourself that you are holding a positive, "intelligent optimist" attitude.


Logical Levels of Change

Miscommunication and misunderstanding can happen when people ‘process’ on different levels. Directing your communication to the appropriate levels can make your interventions more effective, and improve your relationships.


Above and beyond our ordinary everyday interactions is another dimension, another level of energy. This energy will prompt either loving or fearful relationships, behaviours, beliefs or Identities.


This is the way we express ourselves with other people. Our values and beliefs will determine and manifest in our relationships with people, other living creatures, and things.


This is who we are, what we believe ourselves to be and hope others will acknowledge.  Many people are very insecure and cannot separate their opinions from their identity.


Our sense of what is right and wrong, what is permissible or not, what is the way to behave. Values ‘tell’ us what and who matters.


Most people's beliefs are handed down to them. They are seldom updated beyond late teens – or even childhood.


The skills and abilities that we have, or that we (believe we) can develop.


What we do our actions - verbal and physical - in reaction to or designed to change or influence our various environments


Environment sets limits on and creates opportunities for actions that encompass all other levels.